What Would Anne Frank Say About Finding Your True Self as a Young Person?

I spent so much of my diary wrestling with this question: Who am I, really? It is perhaps the most important question a young person can ask, and I believe it becomes even more urgent when you are confined, when your freedom is restricted, when the world seems determined to define you in limiting ways.

You must have the courage to question everything—what you've been told to believe, what your parents believe, what society expects of you. I did this, sometimes to my parents' exasperation. I argued about God, about morality, about what it meant to be a good person. These arguments were not rebellion for its own sake; they were necessary. I could not simply accept what I was told; I had to discover what I actually believed.

You must also accept that you will be contradictory. I was serious and silly, passionate and practical, idealistic and realistic. I contained multitudes, and so do you. Don't try to be consistent or neat or what others expect. Be fully yourself, even if that self is complicated and changeable.

Give yourself permission to be selfish in the best sense—to pursue what genuinely interests you, to follow your passion, to do the work of becoming yourself. This is not selfish in a cruel way; it is necessary self-respect. You cannot become your best self if you are always trying to be what others want you to be.

Be vulnerable. Share your real thoughts and feelings with people you trust. I did this in my diary and with Peter. The act of being known—truly known—is terrifying but essential. You discover who you are through honest connection with others.

Finally, understand that finding your true self is not a destination but a lifelong journey. I was still discovering who I was when my life was cut short. But that discovery itself—that process of questioning, growing, becoming—that was the meaning. Be patient with yourself. Be curious about yourself. And be brave enough to become whoever you are meant to be, regardless of what the world expects.